It can be scary – walking into a room full of strangers. We are all just so different and not all personalities mix. Each one of us was raised with completely different backgrounds, points of views, and opinions that could be seen as foreign from the other. We all have our comfort zones and getting a feel for the boundaries of the new faces we connect with can be quite difficult to identify.
For the most part, the initial meet-n-greet of any relationship can feel like a nerve-wracking endeavor. I don’t know how others will respond to my presence when I arrive, but I personally have learned that if I stay ‘as me as can be,’ I will always be a person who brightens up the room every time I walk into it.
Here is a simple trick that gives me a load of confidence before I walk into a room filled with people. The moment before I open that door: I walk in with confident strides, my chest up, a deep breathe, and I act as if my best friend had just finished telling me the most hilarious joke I had ever heard. It’s amazing! It raises my vibration tremendously. It’s a contagious feeling of energy and my personal secret to how I claim my space in any room.
Human beings are instinctual on making quick first impressions of you in the first seconds in their view. It only takes seconds for them to put a label on you as they try to get a feel for who you are. So how you present yourself from the start of every relationship is super important! You are being labeled (mostly subconsciously) by the way you first present yourself. So score high! Eye contact and confident smile look great on you. And if you take the time to personally acknowledge every person in your space, then, Congratulations! – You earned your respect from everyone in the gathering.
A mentor of mine taught me the golden 2:1 Ratio. He said, “God gave you two ears and one mouth, so use them proportionately.” When you talk half as much as you listen, you make the speaker feel important. Everyone enjoys the feeling of being deeply listened to. Engage, but with no interruptions until it is your turn to speak. This will make the other person see you in a higher light, and you leave the conversation with more knowledge of whatever topic that was spoken. So really focus on what is being said. Stay consciously aware of their words, and not just what you are going to say in response.
When I find myself in conversation, I like to focus on the silence in between the speaker’s words. That slows down the discussion and allows me to relax in the shared moment. When you are fully invested in the content of the chat, you find that the other is more comfortable around you and attentive to what you have to say.
When you do speak, be confident in your words. You demonstrate your communication skills by confidently using your voice. Voice projection is key with balance. Do not be too loud but make sure that you are speaking loud enough to where your listener can hear you clearly. Also, use your whole body to project your words of a story. Using your hands to describe your tale aids in the imagination process of your audience.
When speaking in a group, lead it! Take charge by making sure that everyone is included in the conversation. Many times the ‘quiet’ ones in the circle have the most incredible points and insights. But without your encouragement, these points would probably be left unsaid. So share a little of your confidence with your group and encourage all to speak their minds.
Overall, it just feels better to feel confident. If that seems a bit awkward at first, really try to fake it until you make it. Learn to take pride in yourself and everything that you do. Be proud to be you in your own skin because at the end of the day, “As within, so shows out.” So all that truly matters is your own self-image and what you think and say about yourself. Create yourself, and all will respond. That is what determines your true confidence in dealing with people.
Photo Credit: Pexels.com